Skeleton Keys

Eventually, I’m going to add stuff to this page and it will serve as a key of sorts to explaining who some of the people are that I frequently mention in my blog. Until then though, you’re on your own.

Now of course I would love to get this page over and done with and make it easy for everyone to follow along… but there’s a problem. How do I do it in such a way that doesn’t give away the identity of the other people involved, but still gives a good clear picture of who they are and how they fit into things? I know who I need to define here, but not how. *sigh* Someday, somehow.

Most of these, especially the guys, have been added in the order they appeared in my blog. Obviously notes next to some of the earlier ones may no longer be accurate now that other factors have come into play.

Well, here goes… I’ll add to it as I can.

The Ladies:

• Crazy Bitch - This was a family friend I worked for for a while… who turned out to be, well, a crazy bitch. She screwed my family over and then refused to own up to her own bullshit. Am I still kind of bitter about this? Yes. Is there anything I can do about it now? No.
• The Connoisseur – My best friend in the whole wide world. She’s my sister and my soul mate, though maybe not in the sappy romantic way. She gets me and I get her. Mostly. We’ve been friends since we were 12.
• Cookie – A friend I met in a CG class at AVC. We don’t talk that often but she’s one of the nicest people I’ve ever known.
• Princess – A good friend I’ve known since I was about 18 or 19. We met through a party crowd and partied for months before we ever started hanging out sober.
• Yenta – She requests a bit of secrecy, so I’ll just leave it at this: if she wasn’t either half of her racial make-up, and was Jewish, she’d be my mother in law. Or at least the village matchmaker. Well, if I were Jewish. Which I’m not.
• Wifey - This is the other half of Princess. And this woman can cook! She doesn’t like a lot of people, but she’s a good friend to have.The more I get to know her the more I see how much we are alike. Its kind of weird sometimes. If either of us ever commit murder or suicide, I’m pretty sure the other will understand. She and Princess now have a large rift between them, so she’s not really the wife anymore, but for simplicity’s sake, she’ll be keeping the nickname.

The Gentlemen:

• Evil Bastard – This was my first serious relationship. He mistreated me in every way possible except for hitting me, and I honestly think that would have been easier to survive then what he did do to me. Unfortunately he seems to make the occasional appearance in my life because I have friends who don’t hate him.
• Canned Meat Substitute (CMS) – A guy I met online and chatted with for ages. Kind of a weird guy too. Socially awkward, and at the same time, a man-whore. We met in person and went out a few times.
• The Boy – I met this one years ago, then we vanished from each other’s lives. In May 2006, we reconnected in person after an online something or other, and it’s been turbulent since. Numerous emotional posts have been inspired by him, and even more numerous frustrations. Some days I want to kill him by my own hand; some days I want to love him and give myself to him is ever way I can.
  Things have been broken off as of now so I might have a chance at other pursuits. Yeah. Right.
• Bookstore Boy – I met him at the book store. Barnes and Noble to be exact. He turned out to be a bit less bright then I had first thought, and just not what I thought at all actually. Fun to hang out with, though a bit goofy. He’s off in the Air Force now.
• Slippery Dick (SD) - I know, this is the worst nickname yet, but considering how hard it seems to be for him to keep his dick in his pants… it fits. I met him at a bar one night, but nothing happened then. Later on there were several hook-ups.
• Bathroom Boy – So-called because of an initial (very drunken) experience in a bathroom. For a while we were hanging out regularly, but now it’s more like we run into other socially on a regular basis. He has his high points and he has some others I’d like to remove with a scalpel blade.
• Survey Dude - I met him through a friend that I met at Barnes and Noble one night. We got pretty close, and I spend more nights at his house then I did at my own for months. Aside form a lot of cuddling, the most physical action we saw together was one make out session. He moved to Oklahoma and brought everything to an end.
• Pseudo-Emo Boy (PEB)- I really hope I can come up with something better as a nick name because this is just lame. But I’m not comfortable using the names of the unknowing and unsuspecting behind their backs in here. A conversation with this one made me realize things must end with The Boy. This one seems to have vanished off the planet. He had a shot but I guess he changed his mind.
• Blueballs - I almost forgot to add this one. He is a friend, but The Connoisseur and I came up with this while having a discussion about what blueballs feels like. He joined our conversation, but not until days later, did he mention that he thought it was a joke and didn’t know it was a real thing.
• Smitten – A guy I met through a friend who decided he wanted to date me and pretty much followed me around like a lovesick calf for weeks. We hung out a little, and there was no spark. I don’t think I could have been less interested. Then one night at the bar, I got way too drunk and he pretty much took advantage of me. Nice, huh?
• The Tims – This is where it gets confusing. There are three different Tims in the picture and looking back on things, I’m not sure which is which in some of the old entries. So if you’re really confused, I’m sorry, but so am I.
• GeekBoy (GB) - This one was a surprise to say the least. I met him through someone else that I barely knew, and things just kind of clicked right off. Clicked in the sense of “Hi. Nice to meet you. Take off your clothes.” Turns out he’s a great person and I’m glad to have met actually him, even leaving out the naked bits.
  Addendum – Turns out he wasn’t such a nice guy. I still hate to say that and hate to admit I got took, but that’s what it comes down to. Makes me sad, but self-preservation wins out over foolish fun.
• NV Guy – One I started talking to online and I’d love to be with but the distance factor is making things suck. A lot of phone calls, and text messages later and and a few conversations about where this could go and we’re dead in the water. I’ve since found other interests.
• SanDi – The Connoisseur‘s boyfriend’s BFF. I kinda like this one. You all know what that means if you’ve been reading for long. Unfortunately he lives a couple of hours away so visits are not going to be frequent.
  Addendum- Now that I’m with MD, he flits with me even more. Go figure.
• Mr. Delicious (MD) – I met this one on the lovely interwebs, and after some on and off back and forth, we dated for a while, did the couple thing, and then he dumped me over MySpace of all places.
  
• Sweetums – This one isn’t a made up name like the rest. It’s his actual name. Okay, just kidding. He’s mine, I love him, and I fully intend to keep him. We’d been friends since 2001, and only after MD so unceremoniously dumped me, did that change. I’m very glad that it did.